September 2010

50 Cent—The Most Homophobic Man on Earth!

Well, who knows if he’s the most homophobic man or not—I probably know a few other men who are so homophobic they’re afraid to touch themselves, hardy har!—but he’s certainly one of the most vocal about these days, isn’t he? First he tweeted something (isn’t it funny how Twitter has become a main source of news these days?) about how when Perez Hilton called him a douche bag, he had his “homie shoot up a gay wedding. It wasn’t his, but it made me feel better.”

Shit Happens

Shit happens. And, as a fair warning: this post isn't a bunch of bullshit- it's horse shit, which is worse.

I was walking in a pasture the other day for reasons I am not yet about to disclose. As I was walking, I avoided a cow pie only to step in a big pile of horse shit. Ordinarily, this wouldn't be a problem, but I had on my newest, trendiest, and most expensive cowboy boots. (I guess that's why they call them shit kickers.)

I tried to clean the boots up as best as I could, but since they weren't canvas tennis shoes (which in all honesty I should have been wearing), I couldn't quite get the shit out of them. The heel of my left boot is shit-stained and the smell hasn't quite left the boot yet, creating a stench that is causing me to leave my formerly-favorite boots outside instead of in the house.

Read a Book, THEN Open Your Mouth

Lately I’ve been hearing a lot of blabbering about issues that people don’t understand whatsoever. This article from Newsweek, for example, lists so many facts that the world knows to be true—evolution, for example, or the falsehood of the “death panels” that Sarah Palin pretty much invented along with whatever else she cackles forth now and then—that Americans seem to simply not believe in/believe in. It’s terrifying to me, for example, that about 1 in 5 Americans think that the sun revolves around the Earth.