If there is one thing I have come to despise in recent years, it's what is sometimes referred to as psychobabble--  the vocabulary popular in many "self-help" books, and amongst some of the general population.  It is annoying--  probably because I am familiar with the English language being used as it was intended.  

One word I've read, and heard tossed around, is 'control.'  Like most psychobabble, it is one of those terms I have been familiar with in an entirely different context--  either preceded by the word 'self-,' or perhaps when referring to something such as keeping one's dog off the couch.  I simply cannot relate to the word 'control' when referring to interactions between human beings.

Like many psychobabble terms, the best I could do was try to figure out what the real word or term should be.  Perhaps instead we could say taking over, having the upper-hand, dominating, or something similar.  A friend had an interesting way of wording it:  Mr.-Billy-Runnin'-Things.  

However, even in trying to grasp the concept, grasping the reason anyone would want to have the upper-hand over other people is something I still do not understand.  I think one rather strange incident illustrates the oddity of it all.  A woman, whom I did not know very well, came to my home one day.  Almost immediately, she started making rude remarks about my hairstyle.  Evidently, she did not like it, as she said it "looked like crap."  She then said she had an excellent hairdresser, and offered to take me there.  "And I will pay for it!"  she added.  As politely as possible, I informed her I liked my hairstyle the way it was.  Each day thereafter, for nearly a week, I received phone calls.  Each time, she told me how much her friends liked the hairdresser, and continued to pester me to make an appointment.  Each time, I politely refused.  After numerous calls of this nature, she finally said I wanted to continue 'looking like crap,' it was 'my decision.'  The next day, the phone rang while I was in the grocery store.  "I made the appointment for you!"  she said.  

The woman was clearly a "Mr.-Billy-Runnin'-Things."  Why do some people seem to have the need to jerk other people around, make other people's decisions for them, or, as pop-psych calls it, 'control' others?  One oddity is many do not use that word to describe their own behavior;  they call it "helping," or some other positive term, when what it really is is interfering, butting in where it is none of their business, or focusing on someone else instead of themselves.  The one factor I have seen that many who want to "run the show" in someone else's life have in common is they are rather ineffective in their own lives.