Toxic Waste Cloud

Don't Shove One of These In My Face!

I got stalked yesterday at a Body Shop-esuqe type of store.

As I sniffed my way around the natural soaps, body massagers and hennas, I was hounded mercilessly and stalked by 2 over-eager salespeople who were basically emulating the sales style of SNL's Gap Girls.

During the 4 minutes I was in the store, I was asked no less than 16 questions, and offered more than 7 things to smell.

If I am shopping alone, it is probably for a reason, which should be crystal clear- I do not want company, I do not want any  advice on how  I should put henna in my hair, which bath salt I should use, or how my skin really needs to be exfoliated.  Read more

Heidi Montag’s mom is my hero. She told her shallow, vacant daughter the blatant truth, what anyone who  has laid eyes on this crazy girl can see: she’s vain, insecure and talentless.

"She was saying how sad it is that my confidence is gone because of the music industry I'm trying to get into." – Heidi Montag, said about her mother.

Heidi Montag: prettier on the oustside, uglier on the inside.

Her poor mother must feel like a mother bird who’s chick has been handled. Heidi would be lucky if her mother didn’t roll her out of the nest for this idiot move. The best thing about this is how Heidi tanked a face and body that was naturally more spectacular than 98 percent of the population. Read more

Ex-Governor Rod BlagojevichIn case you are keeping tabs, you can add Rod Blagojevich (who is not blacker than Obama) to the increasingly long list of names of people that I would willingly puke on if given the chance to do so, particularly at a public event. For a re-cap of Rod Blogovich’s high crimes and misdemeanors, check out his Wikipedia page, which looks more like a rap-sheet than the bio of a former Governor of one of our larger states.
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A-Cup AliciaThe Aussies are most definitely one weird lot. I’ve always suspected as much and it was just confirmed by the recent news about the anti-porn crusanders in Australia, who seem to be even more bizarre than their right-wing American counter-parts.
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Verizon: YOU SUCK!So Verizon Wireless can suck a big fat piece of turd. For the past several months, they have been appearing on my credit report with a big mark saying I owe them money. Well guess what. I have never in my life had an account with Verizon Wireless, and after my experience dealing with them, I never will.

Apparently, back in college in 2000 I had a cell phone with a local company called Unicel. I moved away to a different state in 2005, never again using Unicel's service.

All is fine until 2009 when this red mark appears on my credit report. Verizon says I owe them $90. Fuck you Verizon! I call them and they can't even give me proof that I owe anything. No proof of a final bill, no proof of anything. All they can prove was that at one point I owned a cell phone and it was attached to a Unicel number. They think I'm going to fork over $90? FUCK YOU VERIZON! Read more

"You want me to do WHAT with my money?"You know, it's times like these that make it clear that Rush Limbaugh is his own worst enemy.  If Rush didn't want people to hate him, then the way forward is obvious.  Instead, Rush has chosen to attack the credibility of everyone who has ragged on him for saying what he did about Haiti last week, and to try and misdirect our attention away from what he did say.

Rush constantly falls back on the "I'm being quoted out of context" excuse, combined with "That isn't what I meant."  So let's look at what he said last week.  On the topic of Haiti, Rush Limbaugh said "We've already donated to Haiti.  It's called the U.S. income tax."
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Does Chris Crocker Look Ok for School?Do you believe that it is ok for a boy to wear a skirt to school if he is not in Scotland wearing a kilt? How about a Chris Crocker styled wig, complete with the make-up of Tammy Faye Baker on a male high school student? Should this be in bounds for the school dress code or should this be disallowed on school time?

Along the same lines, is it acceptable for a female student to wear a tuxedo to her Sr. Prom or should she conform to society’s standards and wear a dress? Is that the same type of situation?

The NYT recently ran an article checking out the answers to some of these questions on a cross-country basis. Not surprisingly, the answers varied widely from state to state. Read more

Gone by 2035? Or Not?So it turns out the Himalayan Glacier may not be melting by 2035 afterall. The IPCC report from 2007, the one that was supposed to be the best available scientific information, the most reliable source from the best scientists in the world, was apparently quoting an article from New Science, and that article was from a phone interview with someone talking about just a piece of the glacier based on an article that had not been peer reviewed. So, what became a startling prediction in a UN-sponsored study that has been widely read and referenced, turns out to be a single-source quote from a speculative study written up in an unverified paper.

Here is the line from the report in 2007: Read more

Haiti EarthquakeI haven’t watched much of the footage from Haiti, not because I don’t care, but because I don’t have cable tv. This hasn’t stopped me from reading about it, thinking about it, and wondering what responsibility we in the West have for preventing these kinds of disasters or what we can do now to help.

The two most straightforward ways remain the same for every type of disaster. They need donations of either your time or your money. I chose money, but only a little bit and then felt bad about my donation and its usefulness or lack thereof after reading an article on Gawker criticizing the “netiquette” of using social media to promote your cause.
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Aliens in the Desert?Backpacking means struggling to find rooms in interesting places, lugging an ever-growing backpack around, and meeting weirdos where ever you go. The other day, I met a middle-aged German tourist who bears a striking resemblance to the current pope, but without the hat. He sat at our table and lectured us for a while with  a story of aliens and a myopic viewpoint that probably had more to do with his alcohol consumption than any particular religious bent.

"I met an interesting alien once."  OK, although I myself have never met an alien, I'm at least open enough to listen. Others at our table were not.

"Where?"

"The Sahara." He didn't even pause. Whether this was a true hallucination, a real story, or he was making it up on the fly, he knew his facts.
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